Going Down Read online

  David nodded, grinning.

  “Good.”

  Sean looked pleasantly surprised at the answer, but he quickly covered it up.

  David stopped before finishing the water, holding out on the last few swallows. He didn’t want Sean to leave…but the scene was over. There wasn’t any reason for him to stay.

  “Was it…did that do it for you?” he asked lamely, almost afraid to hear Sean’s answer. David had never had anybody keep him on the edge like that, so perfectly balanced along the boundary. He hoped the dom had enjoyed himself half as much as David had.

  Sean reached out, laying a hand along his cheek.

  “You did great,” he said simply, and dropped his hand. “I should get back.”

  “Yeah, okay,” David said, looking away and doing his best to hide the disappointment. They were coworkers. Sean was helping him out. This once. That’s all.

  Sean nodded and turned on his heel, leaving the door open behind him when he left. Out in the hallway, David caught a glimpse of the senior marketing specialist, chatting with the receptionist. They watched Sean go, then turned back to David with knowing grins.

  “Shut up,” he ordered, pointing at them. “Don’t you have work to do?”

  Chapter Four

  Other than the occasional, annoying comments about finding a dom and finally settling down, the next couple of weeks went back to normal. David actually felt better than he had in awhile, as long as he didn’t count the several minutes of mind-numbing terror that accompanied his ride down to the parking garage each day.

  The doors would slide open and Sean would inevitably be there, his messenger bag slung over one shoulder and definitely glad to see him.

  David would smile, and they’d say “hey” and David would press the garage button, and they’d ride down in silence while David practiced the phrase ‘want to go to dinner, want to go to dinner, want to go to dinner,’ over and over until they both stepped out and the opportunity was lost.

  As long as he didn’t count that, everything was perfectly normal.

  That’s what he managed to tell himself, until the day when the door opened and Sean wasn’t there.

  Nobody was there.

  It wasn’t until the smile slid off his face that David realized how much he’d been looking forward to their stupid, silent, two-minute interaction.

  He got in and pressed the basement button, and when the doors opened he forced himself to walk out.

  He wasn’t going to ride back up to the top to make sure he hadn’t missed Sean somewhere along the way. He was not.

  He didn’t, but only by a slim margin.

  He might have dawdled around the elevator for about five minutes, pretending to work a knot out of his shoulders while surreptitiously keeping an eye on the people filing out.

  Admittedly, he was being stupid. Even if he did see Sean getting out of the elevator, he had no excuse for waiting and definitely nothing to say — other than ‘I’ve been masturbating to the thought of you for the last two weeks and if you’re not busy sometime maybe you can spank me delirious again.’

  As a conversation starter…it wasn’t ideal.

  He spent the rest of the evening in a distinctly unfocused state of mind.

  Maybe Sean had quit. Maybe he’d been transferred to another location. Maybe he’d been promoted and he was working another shift. Or on another floor.

  Or maybe, David’s subconscious whispered, he just didn’t run into you because there’s nothing between you and you damn well know it.

  David couldn’t miss the way his stomach dropped at the thought. It was irrational — he couldn’t lose something he’d never had.

  But still.

  “Focus,” David muttered to himself.

  He spent a couple minutes glowering at the novel he’d been trying to read, before finally setting it aside.

  Obviously, he would have to make himself focus.

  He stalked into the bathroom, flipping the lights on as he went.

  He avoided looking at himself in the mirror as he undressed. He never liked seeing the stunted, irregular marks sullying his torso, but he only truly hated them right before a punishment.

  Grimacing, he stepped into the shower. He took several short breaths, steadying himself. He could do this. He knew he could. He’d proven that a long time ago.

  His cock stayed soft and uninterested between his legs. There was none of the nervous excitement he got before scening with (Sean) a dom. This wasn’t a scene. This was discipline. Because he needed it.

  He took one last deep breath and swung the handle all the way over to ‘H.’

  The cold hit him like a physical blow, sending pins and needles across his bare skin. He closed his eyes, letting the frigid water pour over him.

  The water would eventually max out at a hundred and twenty degrees. David knew that, because he’d measured. But he had two minutes before the hot water would reach him. It started much colder— sixty maybe. Seventy tops.

  He didn’t bother tracking the time. His phone rested on the counter, ticking down the seconds. He didn’t look. He was shivering, despite the gradually warming water.

  He kept his hands flat against the glass wall, refusing to let his body twist away from the pounding cold. Beneath the sound of the water, he could hear himself beginning to whimper.

  Good.

  This was his body learning. He didn’t need a dom to take care of him— he was perfectly capable of punishing himself. This was what he deserved, the cost of being such a needy little bitch —

  The water turned lukewarm and he grit his teeth. His muscles trembled, fighting to escape but forced to remain still. It wasn’t over yet. Barely even half.

  Even tepid water felt blistering, and as it grew hotter, he could see his skin beginning to turn pink. It didn’t throb — not that deep pounding warmth he’d gotten when Sean had spanked him—

  The train of thought derailed when the water became painfully hot, burning every inch of him as it splattered across his skin. David could hear himself crying, now, though the water washed the tears away. His hands trembled against the glass as he struggled to stay still, to accept the punishment he knew he needed.

  The phone beeped and David slammed the handle back to the off position. Immediately, the burning deluge stopped and he dropped to his knees. The bathroom air seemed cool against his skin, and he blindly reached for a towel.

  ~~~~~

  That got him through the rest of the night, got him up the next morning, got him dressed and ready for work. It got him through the morning and through most of the afternoon before he started thinking about the elevator again.

  And by ‘thinking about the elevator,’ what he really meant was, he was thinking about Sean. And what Sean had done in the elevator.

  He tried not to watch the clock, not to obsess over what he’d say or how the interaction would go. If Sean was there at all, he’d probably say ‘hey’ and then carry on in silence, like always, so it’s not as though it mattered that much anyway.

  By the end of the day, he was damn near sick with anticipation. He hated himself for it. This was why he’d never wanted to find a dom.

  Guy slaps your ass once and bam, that’s the end of it for you. You spend the rest of your life following him around like a lovestruck puppy.

  The doors opened on a familiar face and David’s anxiety evaporated.

  “Where were you yesterday?” he blurted, too relieved for social graces. Sean blinked.

  “Hello to you, too.”

  David stepped into the elevator, not bothering to push the button for the parking garage.

  “I thought maybe they fired your dumb ass.”

  Sean laughed.

  “Jesus, I wish. Some numbsku
ll decided to test his new routing protocol on a production DNS server. We had to physically visit every computer in the damn building and point them manually back to the intranet.” He frowned. “Hasn’t anyone been up to fix yours?”

  “Not that I know of,” David said, pondering. Sean scowled.

  “Fucking Charlie. She’s probably hoping you’ll put in a ticket, which her matchmaking little gremlins can route to my desk. Your computer was assigned to her, I know it.”

  “You checked,” David said, glancing over. Sean’s mouth opened, then closed.

  “Just wanted to make sure it was getting handled.”

  David’s reply was interrupted when the elevator jolted downward, responding to a call on another floor. David snapped out of his thoughts, pressing the parking garage button at last.

  ~~~~~

  Two days passed before David made the connection.

  Sean came up the day after the DNS incident. He fixed the settings on David’s computer and the two of them made idle small talk. David didn’t ask for another scene. Sean didn’t offer.

  And that was fine, expected, because David wasn’t looking for a dom. He saw Sean in the elevator. They had a professional relationship. It was fine.

  Until Friday afternoon. David was sitting at his desk, genuinely working on something unrelated, and the realization hit him like a bolt of lightning.

  He paused, going back over their interactions, trying to be sure.

  He couldn’t be sure.

  Not until he got in the elevator that evening and, yep, Sean was there.

  David gave him a nod and stepped in, pressing the button for the garage.

  “Got weekend plans?” he asked, hoping it sounded casual. Sean shrugged, looking over.

  “Netflix, starcraft, chores. You?”

  “No plans with your sub?” David pressed, ignoring the reciprocal question.

  “Don’t have one.”

  David nodded.

  “That’s rough. High-level like you. Getting by on random scenes must be hard.”

  Sean’s face hardened.

  “I manage. How goes the search for a dom?”

  “I’m not searching. So let me ask you something.”

  “Shoot,” Sean answered, keeping his eyes on David.

  “So the tech offices are on two, right? That’s where you’re normally at, during the day?”

  “Yeah, why? Gonna send me a kiss-o-gram?”

  “Because I’m on seven,” David pushed on, ignoring the jab. “So I’m wondering what route you’re taking that’s passing through seven on the way between two and sub-three.”

  Sean’s eyes widened a little, but he recovered.

  “There’s an end-of-day report I drop off on nine. This is just on the way back down.”

  David nodded, pretending to consider.

  “Any reason you don’t press the sub-three button when you get in, on nine?”

  The elevator dinged, the doors sliding open to reveal the darkened concrete of the garage. Sean was actually turning red, staring at the floor.

  “The first time really was a coincidence,” he mumbled after a second. David nodded, stepping out into the cool air. “I stopped to check my phone and all of a sudden the doors shut and I was headed down to seven.”

  “And after that?”

  “…maybe less of a coincidence,” Sean admitted, not looking at him. “It’s stalker-ish, I know. I didn’t intend for this to continue the way it has.”

  “It’s worked out pretty well for me,” David remarked. Sean glanced up at him, and David kept talking. “I mean, I don’t scene a lot, but our two were good. Like, really good.”

  Like maybe the best I’ve ever had, he didn’t add. But Sean was scowling now.

  “You’re fine, don’t get me wrong. But it won’t end well. Trust me.”

  David nodded, a little disappointed.

  “…just ‘fine’?” he asked after a second. Sean rolled his eyes, throwing his hands up in the air.

  “Yes, ‘fine.’ For something I put together at a minute’s notice, it was ‘fine.’ But you have to know it’s not enough. I know it’s a thrill to scene with a high dom, but I’m not clear with my markings because I’m trying to score a random lay. They’re a warning.”

  His voice dropped at the end, and David couldn’t help shivering. They were alone now in the dimly lit garage, the elevator having retreated back to the upper levels.

  “A warning of what?” he asked at last.

  Sean’s eyes were hard as he looked the sub over.

  “I want more than you’ll give me,” he said slowly. David swallowed.

  “How do you know?”

  Sean was on him in a second, crowding him against the wall beside the elevator door. Sean’s hands were tight around his arms, and the dom leaned forward, speaking directly into David’s ear.

  “You like what I did to you? Because that barely counts for me. From the first time I saw you, I wanted those green eyes to sparkle. Just for me.”

  “What would count?” David whispered. He could feel himself getting hard. Another minute, and Sean would be able to feel it, too. The dom chuckled, low and dark.

  “I want you immobile. Utterly helpless. I want you bound so perfectly you can’t even writhe as I strap you.” His breath was hot on David’s throat, and the sub trembled. “I want to keep that thick, responsive cock of yours in a cage, with the key around my neck so I know you’re always waiting for me. I want you spread-eagled on my bed, gagged and masked while I map out every inch of your body. I want to know how to take you apart, and how to put you back together.”

  The elevator dinged, letting a gaggle of accounting interns out into the gloom. Sean stepped back, releasing David’s arms, his gaze dropping. The newcomers glanced over, but passed, giving each other clipped ‘goodbyes’ as they separated.

  It wasn’t until they were gone that Sean looked back to David. His eyes were sharp, obviously already prepared for the rejection he knew was coming.

  David hesitated. He shouldn’t do this. Sean was probably right. The scenes sounded amazing— everything he’d ever wanted, actually. But beyond that? Sean would probably want him at home, collared and crated and waiting. David’s current job was almost certainly out of the question, which should be a dealbreaker and even still, he felt his heart racing as he raised his eyes to meet Sean’s.

  “Okay,” he whispered.

  Chapter Five

  David sat quietly and tried not to squirm. The street lights washed over them, illuminating Sean’s car in periodic flashes.

  Sean didn’t look at him. His eyes were focused on the road, hands steady on the wheel.

  The radio played classic rock, the song info scrolling slowly across the LED readout on the dashboard.

  Wherever they were headed, it was in the nicer part of town. They’d been on the interstate for nearly fifteen minutes before pulling onto a darkened off-ramp. Now, peering out the window, David watched brightly lit two-stories passing by.

  After a few minutes, Sean pulled into a driveway. The house was dark, but David could see ivy climbing up one side.

  “You live here?” he asked, looking through the glass. Sean raised an eyebrow.

  “Yeah?”

  “Dunno. Figured you geeks went more for the glass and aluminum look.”

  Sean smirked, pushing his door open and flooding the space with light.

  “I inherited it. Come on.”

  David unbuckled his seatbelt, following Sean up the wooden steps to the side door. Sean keyed the door open, stepping inside and kicking off his shoes. David paused, not sure what he should be doing, exactly.

  “I’m going to change,” Sean said, walking briskly through the entrywa
y, flipping lights on as he went. “Wait here. I’ll make some food and we can talk about…whatever the hell this is.”

  Sean vanished down a darkened hallway.

  David self-consciously removed his shoes, venturing further into the house. It was built with an older-style floor plan, French doors separating smaller rooms. Sean kept the doors propped open, making the space less claustrophobic. Looking to one side David could see a living room, overstuffed easy chairs surrounding a flat screen. Across from that was a dining room, mostly filled by a large table. Beyond, David could see a kitchen, antique tiles offsetting modern appliances.

  He heard footsteps behind him and he turned.

  Sean was dressed simply, worn jeans under a long-sleeve button up. David tried not to stare at Sean’s hands, rolling sleeves up to reveal marked forearms.

  He blatantly stared. Sean noticed.

  “You really like these, huh?” the dom asked, holding one arm up to the light. David nodded.

  “There…aren’t many. Like you,” he said, by way of explanation. Sean nodded and walked past him, bare feet silent on the dark wood floor.

  “Sit there,” Sean said, pointing to the barstools lining one side of the kitchen counter. David obeyed, sliding into the one closest to where Sean was sitting.

  “Got any allergies?” the dom asked, rummaging beneath the stove.

  “No. Well. Cephalosporin. But I doubt you’ll need to know that.”

  “Hmm,” Sean agreed, finding the pot he was looking for. He carried it to the sink. The water ran hot within a few seconds, and David shivered, remembering what he’d needed to do in the shower.

  “I’m not much of a cook,” Sean explained. “Most of this stuff is prepackaged. I wasn’t really expecting company.”